A Fork in the Road

At a low point, I resented inanimate objects. 

Like the dishwasher. 

It growled at me like the furnace in Home Alone. 

The dishes were a microcosm of all the minor obstacles that some unnamed enemy had erected between me and freedom. 

We can tell our kids the dishes only take 5 minutes when they complain. 

Yet we have trouble convincing ourselves of the same truth. Walt Whitman wrote, “I contain multitudes.” Apparently so. 

👀 See, we adults see a truth that the younglings are spared: The dishes never end.

As I mused to a coaching client just yesterday, we sometimes feel like a prisoner breaking rocks in the yard. 🔨 ⛓️

As soon as we’re done and start to make a break for the fence, they bring more rocks. 🪨

And the watchman wakes. 

Breaking Rocks

(To murder this analogy horse…)

We have a choice. 

One prisoner, Alandre, shows up every day like a goldfish. 🐡 Yesterday’s rocks don’t vex him; tomorrow’s rocks don’t give him anxiety. He just lives. 

Another prisoner, Jacque, gets overwhelmed by the thought of tomorrow’s rocks. And the next day. And the next. 😫

It’s so taxing that he begins to sleep poorly. He no longer jokes around with his comrades. His work slows down.

And the watchman grows vengeful. 

If you had a friend going to a French prison in some old movie, what would your advice be? 

Cool Hand Luke

My freshman year of high-school soccer, I was a prodigy. 

Our Belizean coach nicknamed me in his Spanish accent tinted with an island flair: 

“Cool Hand Luke” 

I don’t know how, but I unlocked something I hadn’t before. 

A big part of it was a mixture of passion for the game and anger toward the bullying I received from older teammates. 

But mostly, I lost all attachment to result. 

The only thing I cared about everyday was giving it my all. 

If we obsess about all of the obstacles, we:

❌ Play tighter
❌ Think about failure
❌ Try to control everything
❌ Worry about what people think 

But there on the pitch…

(Okay, let’s be clear, no one – and I mean no one – in the U.S. of A. called it “the pitch” back then. That’s a novel douche-ism on this side of the pond for middle-aged corn-fed dads to try to one-up other sideline dads.) 

Okay, anyway, there on the Spruce Creek High School practice field, only ONE thing mattered if I lost the ball. 

Get.
The.
Ball. ⚽️

Period. 

At least half the time I could get back up and chase down whatever m—--f—-er twice my freshman size had managed to nick it away from me. 

If you’re reading this, you probably have that same intensity. 

The problem is, the real world is not soccer. 

(Okay, no one said “nick” either, but I love my British procedurals.) 

Break the Overwhelm Cycle

In the real world, things move more slowly. 

There’s no game clock. It’s 24/7. 

So if you’re ambitious, you logically conclude that nothing should stand in your way of going full tilt on your goals. 

It’s a form of entitlement. And I’m not judging. 

You do one of two things: 

1. You do the dishes right away – yet you despise every millisecond of it. You’re seething. (or the laundry, cause let’s be clear: That s— never ends.)
   

2. You procrastinate. 

The dishes build. And so does your resentment. 

Either way you lose. 

📌 The only way to do it is to show up consistently, yet consistently let go. 

You let go by:

1️⃣ Breathing
2️⃣ Staying present
3️⃣ Saying “this doesn’t matter”
4️⃣ Realizing everything will be okay
5️⃣ Remembering NO ONE gets everything done

Doing the dishes is not taking away from life.
If you’re human, doing the dishes IS life.

Along with everything else.

If you do just one thing every day to move forward, that’s more than 99.999% of humans in history.

Doing the dishes for 5 minutes isn’t hurting your odds of doing that.

But unless you get control, your mind WILL.

Stop fantasizing about how your spouse could do it. Or how one day when you’re wealthy, you’re hire Belizean maids and butlers to do all this for you.

For some of you, you’re thinking, “Duh, this is part of growing up.” 

But for many of you, you have a zillion dishwashers plaguing your life. And clogging up your goals. 

So breathe, and start doing those dishes. 

Or worst case: 
Break ‘em.

❤️ Andrew

Coda

PS. Does anyone recommend Lioness? Trailers look epic. 

Bet girl can break some f—ing dishes. 🍽️

Outro 

Breakin’ Dishes by Rihanna (Duh.)

My daughter loves this song. Samesies. 

Cheers

🍪 Let’s talk: Feeling overwhelmed by life and the dishes? Grab your free slot to meet with me, and let’s break some dishes together. 🍽️ 💥 🙌

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I’d love to hear from you.

Get unstuck, and crush it. Double period. 🔱